Conversations with God – 2

The last post in this series had a fantastic response and many of you had expressed how much it had inspired us all with the simplicity in style and the profoundness of expression.

This is the second post in this series by Guruji entitled FINALLY I HEARD HIM SPEAKING TO ME

Do write in and share your thoughts with Guruji and other Satsanghis.

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I asked Him……”Why did you take so long to talk?”
He said :“I was always with you, right from your childhood, but you never listen to me. Do you recall your 5th std classmate Sadananda, one the most brilliant among your rivals?”
“Yes, I remember him, he died…….He sent for me on his death bed.”
“Yes, but you did not go to see him. Do you remember what you did to him, when you were Class Monitor?”
“Yes, I was absent for some 10 days. And when I returned to class, I changed his marks in the class register, which was in my custody, so that, inspite of my absence for 10 days, I remained a bigger total……… and I placed enough zeros and prevented him from becoming a monitor, so that my position remained unassailed; I misused my position.”
“Do you know how much he loved you? And yet you did not care for him!”
“Do you mean to say it was you who came as Sadananda? My God, what a catastrophe!” I asked in bewilderment.
He continued: “Do you remember Amba Mai the cook, at Kundapura, who served you children for Rs 6/- a month for so many years? When you changed your residence to Mumbai, do you recollect her parting words?”
“Yes I do……..a painful comment on my character. She said that she had forgotten even the nastiest insults by all of us children, but she said that she would not be able to forget what I did to her.”
“What did you do to her?”
“It was most shameful, considering myself brilliant, a swollen headed brat that I was, I tempted her to steal a rupee that was placed in her path. I caught her red handed in front of the whole household and guests. Without realizing that it was an insult akin to’ Dushshaasanaa’s vastrapaharna’. I regret such incidents of my childhood………..and now, do you say that it was you who came to me as maid?”
“Yes my friend, I was that Amba Mai; I have always remained close to you, but it was you who failed to recognize me all these decades.”
“Then there must be a number of occasions when you stepped into my life and guided me, helped me?”
“Of course, you were always reading Vishnu Sahasranama without paying attention to meanings of the names; do you remember Pura-ranjana’s story in Srimad Bhagavatha? When the king died, the queen (Puraranjana reborn as queen) wails and wants to commit sati; she was gently reminded by her friend? Do you remember his name?”
“Yes, Avijnaatha, meaning the one who is very near you and yet not known to you.” You mean…………..I understand now; you were always with me in different forms and yet I failed to see you. For I had but one interest; Me and My spouse, My children, My grandchildren, My bank accounts and My everything. The shameless I; Oh lord how forgetful was of my true nature!”
At this moment, somebody disturbed us; I was distracted and lost Him. As I ruminated over the conversation, I remembered my Guru’s words. ”The only way to get rid of this ‘ I and Mine’ is to somehow serve others; Place them first, day and night; you will have no time to think of yourself. The first sloka of the famous Isavaasya Upanishad says,

“Isa-vaasyam idam sarvam, yat-kincha jagatyaam jagat,
Tena tyaktena bhunjiitah , maa gridhah kasya-swidhanam”

Meaning:

This world is controlled by the great ishwara; (each of) you take only that which is necessary for (personally) yourself, and leave the rest (untouched); (you can enjoy this only by renunciation). I have to live on as little as possible and leave the rest for others. There is no choice for me except to work for the society, if I want Him to love me. And who does not want His love?

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